dao

Warning: This is pure rambling and is an entire waste of time.

Some of my dear friends are getting really sick of me complaining about this, but I have to say something. It's so difficult to break the first hurdle when it comes to making friends sometimes!!! People just naturally assume I'm dao or that I'm angry. Even the people close to me can't tell, and that SUCKS.

I can't help this face I'm born with. I hate it sometimes. But I can't go around perpetually with a smile on my face because it would make me look absolutely psychotic. At this point I start to wonder whether it is really worth all the effort to try to be friendly in order that people don't get turned off or offended. I mean, my friends wouldn't care right, whether I looked like that. But then, you ask yourself, "You could have so many more friends if you just looked more approachable and friendly".

It does hit me. It takes time to build a foundation or community of friends because I just don't warm up to crowds that quickly and easily. People sometimes takes years to take the step to smile and say hi before a friendship is started. But after the first hurdle, I warm up pretty fast to them. It's just that freaking first step that is so hard to cross. And many either cannot be bothered or just don't dare to.

And it doesn't help that I'm shy and daren't take the first step. Well this sucks.

When things suck, suck it up.