Sunday, February 12, 2006

I'm starting to live for the weekends, particularly Fridays and Saturdays, when the days are entirely mine and I'm not accountable to anyone as to how I spend my time. Weekdays are exhausting. I'm always on the ball, always conscious of how I should conduct myself, but I like to think I'm starting to understand a little bit more what is expected of me.

Just when I think I'm getting slightly better job-wise, I'm starting to wonder why my personal life is starting to fall apart, piece by piece. Doubts resurfacing, the lows are coming back. Right now, the people I can confide in are far away. There is no time to meet up with them anymore. Is this what loneliness feels like? Maybe it's the lack of sleep talking. The friends are changing. The people I used to confide in have slipped away. I hope it's not just the weak threads of nostalgia that are binding us... I really hope there was more to it, especially since I put so much faith in these ties once.

Anyway, on a positive note, Wala's was wonderful as usual. Jack was stellar, Ray was magnetic. They played Jason Mraz and Matchbox Twenty and Five for Fighting... There was good company, good wine and good food after. Definitely reignited my excitement over the upcoming Jason Mraz concert. There was the climax of the week, the saving grace that made the week great.

The TOUCH KIDZ skit went smoothly too. It's amazing how I tried to approach it like any other performance - learning my lines, making sure my cues were right, ensuring there was interaction with my fellow actors - but in the end, all was tossed to the wind by the response of the audience. Our young 10-12 yr olds responded so violently and so passionately to the simple storyline unfolding on the stage. It really struck me how simple their young minds are now, and it gave me one further peek into these mindsets. Has it been so long, that I've forgotten what it felt like to be at that age? The voice were yelling at the male character not to give in and apologise, the girls were slightly more passive, but they were reacting indignantly to the boys. Hope the ultimate message of love and forgiveness actually reached our target audience!!!

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